Change is the only constant

I had this quote once before I think, but it is so true! In life, especially at work this line is a steady base. My work has been really dynamic lately. And looking back, this job has been one bumpy dynamic ride. Just now my colleague phoned me saying she (for 99%) has a new job. For her it is brilliant. At work she wasn't able any more to be herself and evolve. She literally became sick of it. I am happy for her, but a little sad for me. She is the second 'working experience' colleague I had and I she was really nice to work with! My first colleague left after a little over a year because he wanted to go and study again. Then she came, and a little before she reaches the 2 year mark, she will most likely leave. 

Them leaving makes me a bit sad because it forces me to look at myself. The first colleague wanted to gain some work experience in the field. He was still young (2 years younger than me) and finding his professional self. I could very much relate because, as you know, I like my job but often wonder what else is out there. This find the 'else'  that is out there, you have to take a leap. He took one, and I didn't. Well baby steps I did, talking to some people, sniffing out different jobs. But not the big step. But then again, about 8 months ago I got myself a fixed contract. And in the life's phase I am in, it provides me with a little security. You know in case there will be babies. 

Then this girl came around, more sure this was her line of job. I could give her room and time to evolve in her job, she really liked it, our supervisor approved it, and we both were really finding our place in this job. Then with all the changes from last years and early on in this year, things changed again. The room to go besides your narrow job description became a lot smaller. Which for her meant a lot of handing in the extra things she could do. It is a shame because we really had it going good. Now she will most likely go off taking new steps, and I remain seated. Another mirror. 

Change is the only constant in life. A cliché quote because it is so true. I realize that for me change functions as a mirror. Because it makes me rethink my situation. I feel it only impacts me because it should impact me. It should function as a mirror. So I should really take it into account. I am just not quite sure how to proceed and take action for my own. 

Ciao!

Ixis

Went to the doctor

Today I went to the doctors to get a blood test done. My hair is really try thin and falling out by the piece that other people start noticing it too. As it really bothers and worries me I decided to pay a visited. Got some blood drawn today and it will be tested for all sorts of things. It will be checked for vitamins, glucose levels, kidney function, hormones and thyroid action. I also get medication and a lotion, which is ordered today and I can pick up tomorrow. Wednesday I can call back for the results of the bloodtest. To be honest I am quite nervous and a bit worried. Thyroid problems run in the family. But on the other hand, it is better to be aware of it so then action can be undertaken. 

Ciao!

Ixis

Not fitting in

There are many places I feel like a stranger, where I feel I don't belong. My family is one of those places. I don't mean my mom and dad, but my aunts, uncles, nieces and nephews. They just seem like this completely different type of people. Everytime there is an event (like a birthday or something like that) I attend. But each time I just don't fit in. There is no conversation I can join. No questions I can ask. I am not loud enough, I am not asked. Then I invite my family once, almost no one can attend. It makes me feel like I just don't count. Today the son of my niece celebrated his first birthday. But I just couldn't make a conversation. Especially with my loud family. I also was embarrassed because I said something, which was blabbermouthed on to my entire family. Great. And my gift? Well, that was just a strange dirty book. Even though it was on the requested list. I am sure after I left my family would have complained about how cranky they probably found me, and how I made my mom and dad go home. Well I guess I have to deal with that. So next time? Maybe I will do my family a favor and don't attend. In that case I cannot ruin their celebration. And I get to spend a little free time for the weekend. Because guess what, it is already 7PM and in about 3 hours I need to go to bed, because the stupid tired me cannot get out of bed otherwise. 

Ciao!
Ixis

Canada countdown: 8 weeks to go!

Counting down continues. 8 more weeks to go. At the moment, I don't feel like going. I am a little bit sad.

second period

And it was quite accurate again. Last wednesday I got my period again. About a week after my nipples were sore. So I guess it is a clear indicator. I am quite happy with my cycle this time. From 196 days last time, my cycle was 37 days this time! Wauw, I am really proud of my body for cutting it down so much!

But my hormones were raging. I was (am still maybe) a real devil at home the past week(s). And ugh to my hair! It is so thin and falling out :( But since my body is still trying to regulate my cycle and my hormones I want to give it time. If it doesn't stabilize or improve maybe I should go and see a physician.

Ciao!
Isis

7 months off birth control

I have been 7 months off of birth control. 5 weeks ago I got my first actual period after 6,5 months. And actually it was my first real period after about 10 years on the pill. My belly is a little bit cramped up so maybe my next period is coming. Which would then be 5 weeks after the previous one. That would not be so bad, as it took my body 6,5 months to regulate all the hormones again. But I have to wait and see, because maybe nothing happens and it is just a cramp. However, these last few months I am noticing body changes much more clearly. For example about a week before my last period my nippels were sore. I recognized it immediately, and a week later I was getting my period. Last week my nipples were sore again, so if my period is coming it is a clear sign. 

I want to give my body some time to regulate itself again. There still are some symptoms or sign I am experiencing and I think it is relate to my hormones but I am not sure. Like my hairloss. Before, I didn't have thick hair, but after I quit birth control it has even become more thin! I started a special thickening shampoo and I am taking some extra vitamins now so I hope it will help. 

Ciao!

Ixis

Canada countdown: 10 weeks to go!

And the countdown progresses. 10 more weeks to go! Still haven't really tested our jackets. Even though it is really rainy in the Netherlands for the past few weeks. But the temperature is still quit warm so we don't really need a jacket. And going to work I am only outside for about 2 seconds jumping in and out of my car. Ah well... To warm up, 2 beautiful pictures I found on the internet. First Vancouver and second a view of the Rocky Mountains!